In the early years of the 2020s a man and a woman fall in love and pledge never to forget each other. The human life span is extended indefinitely. After a billion years the man is a general and the Sol system is under attack by cyborgs. The man finds he no longer has room in his brain for the memory of the love affair and the codes necessary to save the Sol system from attack. Tragically, he deletes his memories of the woman. After the war,she comes to see him, but he doesn’t remember her. But she learns from the Rejuvenation Technician that he took his memory of his love for her and stored it in an Alpaca. She has a passionate, physical romance with the Alpaca.
A cyborg in the far future reads the story above, falls in love with humanity and wants to make love with a human, but there are none left. He makes a pilgrimage to the Info-Star, a repository of all past information and decides to recreate a human based on the residing data. However because of quantum degradation in the universal memory bank there is no memory left of what a human looks like. He reconstitutes what he thinks is a human but it is in fact an alpaca. He and the Alpaca have incredibly romantic but very hot intercourse.
A pattern of ones and zeroes at the end of time achieves sentience and,in short order, omnipotence, including the ability to create whole universes. It creates a universe and is ready to destroy it but it falls in love with a vulnerable, beautiful creature on a tiny planet within its self-created plenum. It is an alpaca. He mounts the alpaca right in front of everybody and they make frenetic, painful, yearning, passionate physical love.
-What do you think of my stories?
-Pretty good, but there is too much people having sex with alpacas.
-Thanks, good to hear, good to hear. So how much people having sex with alpacas is too much?