There are some who devote their lives to the pursuit of physical pleasure. They have been known to wreck families to obtain this sensation they seek from sex, to break their bodies and brains chasing it with unsafe driving, to injure themselves and the law obtaining it by means of drugs. For those who count themselves among that buzz-searching tribe I am here to provide a recipe for an intense physical pleasure in the light of which sex, food, and drugs fade like glow-worms in the noonday sun.
- Wake up. Do not drink anything. Eat a teaspoon of salt.
- Wait an hour. Do not drink anything.
- Eat a tablespoon of salt.
- Wait another hour. Do not drink anything.
- Wait another hour. You should now have been awake for three hours without having drunk anything.
- Eat a big piece of watermelon.
This is a rapture that violates no law, outrages no obligation, is politically correct, and does not cause a blush to recount. No, do it as many times as you like, publish it on the front page of your town newspaper and hold your head up high, you Seeker of Pleasure and now Finder too!