Signs he is Not the One for You

  1. He is not the one for you as he not one but many as a collection, a swarm, or crowd.
  2. He is genderless being an abstract quality such as equality, justice, or temperance
  3. He is for no one: he  spreads his musk on the prospector’s cabin and rends the items therein with his claws as he is a wolverine
  4. He is for no one: he is a fine dust coating the books and papers of Bernardo De Las Casas in the University of Salamanca
  5. He is for no one: the echo of a yodel on a fine winter’s morn
  6. He is not as he is a misconception about the meaning of a poem by Keats
  7. He is not for you as he is yourself, but temporally displaced, your Sunday occuring on his Saturday
  8. He is not as he is the copula, connecting Socrates and mortal, banana and yellow
  9. He is not the one for you as “he” “is” “the” “one” “for” and “you” cannot be applied to him as he is ineffable
  10. He is old, fat, or dead

3 thoughts on “Signs he is Not the One for You

  1. N.S. Palmer says:

    Let’s not rule out dead people too quickly. Unless they’re trying to eat your brain, they are usually very low-maintenance.

  2. Mikey says:

    1. You are looking for two or more.
    2. You are not looking for any.
    3. You are looking for a she.
    4. You are looking for someone but you are incompatible with everyone.
    5. You are not a one yourself.
    6. You are the one for you.
    7. You haven’t ordered yet.
    8. You are compatible with everything until you relate to it when you begin to hate it, a hate which becomes all consuming.
    9. You are called Genevieve but the G is pronounced how the French say the J in jardin and it really annoys you when people mispronounce it.
    10. Your heart is as grey as a stone and your nails hide a wealth of graveyard clay from all the digging you do with your hands.

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