Where Do Thoughts Come from? Survey of the Contending Theories

Tempo-paradoxicalism
Time travel from future wholes created by the thoughts

Copro-immanentism
Waste products excreted by higher levels of soul

Secretory-ectoplasmism
Sexual secretions of possessive ghosts

Universal Theriomorphism
Howls of the beast within

Theo-bureacratatarianism
Inbox from cosmic vortex