My friend Sal was once very interested in freedom. So he stopped listening to his parents and quit his job and wandered the world having experiences. He went to Tibet and Antarctica and he joined the singing circles of Bzante-Barongo and so on. Then one day when he was in New York City he met this guy named Mickey. And he explained his project to Mickey and Mickey said “Okay, you are free of everything but your own desire for freedom.” And Sal was like “Okay what should I do?” and Mickey was like “Give your will over to me.” And Sal was like “Okay. I do!” And Mickey said ‘Okay let me cut off your arms and legs.” and he did and he cooked them up in a pan with garlic and he ate them.
Well! The mutilated Mickey dragged himself to my house and I got a doctor friend of mine to make him new wooden limbs, but when universal health care was passed in 2020 there was a special exception made for Micky, the voters decided he was not entitled to any new cyborg limbs or anything on account of he was an idiot.